Sitting at DK Sushi after work. Mmmm... Eating sushi solo, makes me feel very independent. Believe me, that feeling is a rare one as of late. I'm sitting here, and as I wait for my Agadashi Tofu and a Mikey Roll, I think about the events that occured around me today.
A young couple came into the store today. They walked around the store for atleast an hour with two baskets FULL of what looked like supplies for a new abode. Mind you, my super sensitive "y'all just babies" detection devise notified me that these two were no older than nineteen. My initial thought was, "Lawd help the children". But I watched the young man's tenderness toward his lovely better half and I began to feel nothing but love and respect for the both of them. They came to check out and with so much stuff in their baskets, I began to ask questions. It became clear to me that these two didn't have a car to carry their goods home, and I began to get a little angry as I connected that with their youth and how they should've obtained many of the seemingly useless items for their appartment as time progressed. They just HAD to have everything now, or atleast that's the story I tell myself. They'd told me that there were people who were supposed to accompany them to and from the store, but the parties backed out for whatever reason. So it was just him and his girlfriend; Bonnie & Clyde: against the world. They would have to make a seemingly impossible trip back to their apartment on foot with $200 worth of groceries. A lady behind them said, "y'all can't walk that far... The bags are too heavy..."
Then I remembered yesterday and how I ran he store all by myself and a vendor told me that I wouldn't be able to do it. I told myself, "Unless he knows something I don't know... I got this...and I did. It was tough, but it worked out.
You could see the love and care and the concern in the eyes of these two young lovers.
I told myself, I want that. Not necessarily the affection, but the devotion and the determination to do whatever it is that needs to be done in order to survive/maintain.
I told them that they could do it, and to be safe, and they walked out of the store with ALL of their supplies...no problem!!
When somebody tells me that my dreams are impossible, or the goals I've set out to accomplish are unattainable, I'll remember the couple.
Cherish it all,
Jirod
- When every song you sing is out of tune...sing louder.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Of Greater Stuff- My music fix
I live...
For this moment right here. I'm full off of grilled tilapia and I'm riding to Cheapo Discs with my bestfriend Ross. Impulse. But this trip just added a few extra days to my lifespan.
Away from the doldrums. Driving down the streets in Austin. The street lights bathe my bare shoulders, as they scan us through the windshield of the car. Why the heck do I have on a tank top and it's cold?
Because I want to feel this moment. We're bound by music; Ross and I.
In agreement, we venture out into the night to quench our thirst for new, ecomical sources of this nectar that has us hooked.
It's a hit that I'd take in public. It's a line that I'd so unashamedly do in front of my family, it's a substance that I'd take intravenously in plain sight: music. MUSIC...yes... MUSIC.
It's a drug that I'm addicted to. Scew it... I gotta have it.
It doesn't lie to me, it won't leave me. It doesn't care that I've been with others...
{Music Purchase Interlude}
Ahhh... Listen to this mixture of random, yet purposefully pleasing purchases:
-Sarah Vaughn
-Billie Holliday
-Count Basie
-Miles Davis
-Chris Joss (we'll see)
-Philip Glass
Yes...and?
I was really looking for some J-Pop... Of course they had it, but I was looking for another reason NOT to swipe my card again. I almost bought more, but I said "Jirod, pace yourself, Christmas is coming up..." I wanted some Leadbelly, some Sinatra, and some Miles Davis. I also wanted to purchase Shereen's new album. I was turned on to her by a very dear friend of mine, Mohammed, in Doha, Qatar when I visited a few years back.
I must say, if I had the cojones, I'd be a lot like Screamin' Jay Hawkins. He had an outrageous voice, and quite frankly my dears, he didn't give a flip. Look him up. (I Put A Spell On You)
This is where I wanna be... In this room with years and years of music. From Tchiakovsky to T-Pain... It's all here. Away from my dull job, away from the demands of vanity (ha), away from... Cheesily...it all.
I pretend these faces emblazoned upon the covers of these discs; I pretend they are my peers. They look at me with eyes saying, "What the hell are you waiting for? We're waiting."
I sigh, smile a boyish smile... And pick which ones I wanna take home with me.
[Sidenote: Beyonce's "Resentment" feels good to me all week]
Also: [SideEYED Note: This blog was created by ME. I write whatever I want to write, but if I ever offend you, you can come to me and we can talk about. Adults run the world, children throw fits. I like adults.]
Tactfully Yours,
Jirod
For this moment right here. I'm full off of grilled tilapia and I'm riding to Cheapo Discs with my bestfriend Ross. Impulse. But this trip just added a few extra days to my lifespan.
Away from the doldrums. Driving down the streets in Austin. The street lights bathe my bare shoulders, as they scan us through the windshield of the car. Why the heck do I have on a tank top and it's cold?
Because I want to feel this moment. We're bound by music; Ross and I.
In agreement, we venture out into the night to quench our thirst for new, ecomical sources of this nectar that has us hooked.
It's a hit that I'd take in public. It's a line that I'd so unashamedly do in front of my family, it's a substance that I'd take intravenously in plain sight: music. MUSIC...yes... MUSIC.
It's a drug that I'm addicted to. Scew it... I gotta have it.
It doesn't lie to me, it won't leave me. It doesn't care that I've been with others...
{Music Purchase Interlude}
Ahhh... Listen to this mixture of random, yet purposefully pleasing purchases:
-Sarah Vaughn
-Billie Holliday
-Count Basie
-Miles Davis
-Chris Joss (we'll see)
-Philip Glass
Yes...and?
I was really looking for some J-Pop... Of course they had it, but I was looking for another reason NOT to swipe my card again. I almost bought more, but I said "Jirod, pace yourself, Christmas is coming up..." I wanted some Leadbelly, some Sinatra, and some Miles Davis. I also wanted to purchase Shereen's new album. I was turned on to her by a very dear friend of mine, Mohammed, in Doha, Qatar when I visited a few years back.
I must say, if I had the cojones, I'd be a lot like Screamin' Jay Hawkins. He had an outrageous voice, and quite frankly my dears, he didn't give a flip. Look him up. (I Put A Spell On You)
This is where I wanna be... In this room with years and years of music. From Tchiakovsky to T-Pain... It's all here. Away from my dull job, away from the demands of vanity (ha), away from... Cheesily...it all.
I pretend these faces emblazoned upon the covers of these discs; I pretend they are my peers. They look at me with eyes saying, "What the hell are you waiting for? We're waiting."
I sigh, smile a boyish smile... And pick which ones I wanna take home with me.
[Sidenote: Beyonce's "Resentment" feels good to me all week]
Also: [SideEYED Note: This blog was created by ME. I write whatever I want to write, but if I ever offend you, you can come to me and we can talk about. Adults run the world, children throw fits. I like adults.]
Tactfully Yours,
Jirod
Monday, November 30, 2009
Hit ME!
It seems to me, to be an act of cowardice when two people In a relationship decide that they lack the intelligence to have a conversation, or they lack the self control to agree to disagree without using some sort of physical strength to inflict pain on one another. It seems to be the answer in young, lovesick teens... Atleast this is a sample I've been going off of, as of late. What is wrong with young people? Why do they believe they're so dangerously in love? What the HELL do they know about love? (What the HELL do I know about love?)
Scenario: Girl likes boy. Boy likes girl.
Boy decides to expand his mind with the wonder that is COLLEGE.
Girl does not choose to do the same.
Boy goes away to college.
Girl falls into a deep depression because she has no company to share a slice of misery with.
Guy comes back, still likes girl.
Girl has boy in her grasp, but only for a short while because...
Boy must go back to college.
Girl gets upset at boy's decision in doing something with his life and takes out her anger on him.
Girl hits boy...
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is where the bufoonery begins.
You don't hit someone just because their life choices don't match yours.
Be a man or a woman and take care of yourself...
Isn't it funny how people believe that just because they go through stuff, they have to drag everyone else through it too?
Isn't it a shame that people believe that only women suffer from domestic violence?
Isn't it a shame that men are told to run away if a woman is hitting them?
But the answer is simple: keep your hands to yourself.
I wish I could get off this soapbox, but I'm starting to see things a lot clearer from height.
Maybe this is my way of raising my own awareness.
Jirod
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPho
Scenario: Girl likes boy. Boy likes girl.
Boy decides to expand his mind with the wonder that is COLLEGE.
Girl does not choose to do the same.
Boy goes away to college.
Girl falls into a deep depression because she has no company to share a slice of misery with.
Guy comes back, still likes girl.
Girl has boy in her grasp, but only for a short while because...
Boy must go back to college.
Girl gets upset at boy's decision in doing something with his life and takes out her anger on him.
Girl hits boy...
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is where the bufoonery begins.
You don't hit someone just because their life choices don't match yours.
Be a man or a woman and take care of yourself...
Isn't it funny how people believe that just because they go through stuff, they have to drag everyone else through it too?
Isn't it a shame that people believe that only women suffer from domestic violence?
Isn't it a shame that men are told to run away if a woman is hitting them?
But the answer is simple: keep your hands to yourself.
I wish I could get off this soapbox, but I'm starting to see things a lot clearer from height.
Maybe this is my way of raising my own awareness.
Jirod
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPho
Friday, November 20, 2009
Every Drop...
Standing outside on the back porch watching rain fall off the side of the roof into a pond decorated by ivory white granite rocks...
A thought pops into my head, and suddenly opportunity, fear, freshness, and hunger meet me. A new idea, an aha moment, a "give it a chance" situation suddenly makes the long skinny streams of water jetting down off the roof move slower. My new thought allows me to look at every drop imdividually. Every drop is important my soul tells me.
Every drop, as they join their brothers down below in the shallow granite pond. Some drops fall upon the dead grass, in hopes of reviving it, making it green, but they dry up. I honor their attempts... Some drops fall upon the cement foundation in hopes of moisturizing a surface that has already been hardened. Their slippery influence is a reminder that they're here for a time, but they too will dry away. Some drops land on my face, seeking to replace the tears that I've cried on this back porch. The drops that I released in my despair, have come back, they've come home, just as my new idea is calling me to come back, come home... I'll try, old friends.
The rain keeps a promise with me. It tells me that if I look up to the sky on a day such as this, it will repay me for all of the tears I've lost...
I'm looking up.
A thought pops into my head, and suddenly opportunity, fear, freshness, and hunger meet me. A new idea, an aha moment, a "give it a chance" situation suddenly makes the long skinny streams of water jetting down off the roof move slower. My new thought allows me to look at every drop imdividually. Every drop is important my soul tells me.
Every drop, as they join their brothers down below in the shallow granite pond. Some drops fall upon the dead grass, in hopes of reviving it, making it green, but they dry up. I honor their attempts... Some drops fall upon the cement foundation in hopes of moisturizing a surface that has already been hardened. Their slippery influence is a reminder that they're here for a time, but they too will dry away. Some drops land on my face, seeking to replace the tears that I've cried on this back porch. The drops that I released in my despair, have come back, they've come home, just as my new idea is calling me to come back, come home... I'll try, old friends.
The rain keeps a promise with me. It tells me that if I look up to the sky on a day such as this, it will repay me for all of the tears I've lost...
I'm looking up.
Monday, November 16, 2009
The Lames Attack
Have you ever encountered an individual in a confrontation who tries to confuse you with double talk? Let me give you a clearer example.
So, you're in a situation where you've allegedly hurt someone. Now, indeed you may have hurt them, or rather your actions may have hurt them indirectly. But then, you go on to explain to the "hurtee" that you acted in the purest of intentions. You help them understand exactly where you're coming from and they begin to understand. Then, they proceed to their initial feelings of being hurt because, I mean it's all about them anyway.
No matter how you try to explain to them that you mean well, and in fact, you're remorseful. They just want to feel hurt. Eff YOUR feelings right?
So, not exactly double talk, but rather double pity...
I've got more to say...
I'll be back with relevance.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
So, you're in a situation where you've allegedly hurt someone. Now, indeed you may have hurt them, or rather your actions may have hurt them indirectly. But then, you go on to explain to the "hurtee" that you acted in the purest of intentions. You help them understand exactly where you're coming from and they begin to understand. Then, they proceed to their initial feelings of being hurt because, I mean it's all about them anyway.
No matter how you try to explain to them that you mean well, and in fact, you're remorseful. They just want to feel hurt. Eff YOUR feelings right?
So, not exactly double talk, but rather double pity...
I've got more to say...
I'll be back with relevance.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Everything's A Show
You ever wonder what it'd be like if a cameraman followed you every day of your life; filming every little thing you do? (even when you pick your nose, or dig out a wedgie)
I couldn't imagine that actually being reality, but I do like to pretend that I have an audience. Pretending that I have an audience makes my speech more extravagant. I begin to use big words and my level of wit is elevated. I laugh at things that I think my audience will laugh at.
So, I think from now on I'll pretend that I have an audience watching me...atleast on the important days, but not while I'm in the bathroom or in the shower...
I couldn't imagine that actually being reality, but I do like to pretend that I have an audience. Pretending that I have an audience makes my speech more extravagant. I begin to use big words and my level of wit is elevated. I laugh at things that I think my audience will laugh at.
So, I think from now on I'll pretend that I have an audience watching me...atleast on the important days, but not while I'm in the bathroom or in the shower...
Friday, November 13, 2009
Telling A Truth
Right now, I'm infatuated with telling the truth. I can lie. Oh boy, can I lie. I've actually mastered the art of the Convenient Lie for Folks in A Hurry. I've written the book successfully by myself... (No et al) Mister No Et Al... Ask about me. But this season brings about a reason to tell the truth.
A Truth
I get annoyed by loud noises, especially in the midst of silence, while I'm eating my applesauce in the living room and someone takes it upon themselves, or rather, believes that I MUST need a piano/keyboard/steeldrum/guitar serenade. No thanks.
A Truth
People, especially women, who refuse to see the point at hand and care solely about their hurt feelings, neglecting the fact that in a relationship (especially with an artist), you need to look beyond yourself and no that I GOT NEEDS TOO. (Two selfish people cannot co-exist...without a little pushing and shoving...) NOT AN ADVOCATE FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE...
A Truth
I think I'm a genius. But my very lethargic TUMOR of a sub-personality weighs me down.
A Truth
Sometimes I fear disappointment so much, that I'd rather text than talk on the phone.
A Truth
I hold my nose whenever I'm asked to put toilet paper in the womens' restroom at work...I have a fear of what it might smell like.
A Truth
If I can see Godly qualities in you, and you smile a lot, I probably think you're a beautiful creation.
A Truth
I believe that evil resides in certain forms of music. I also believe that a chosen few have adopted that evil and it's aroma has attracted and successfully hooked a brainwashed youth into forming a cult-like following.
A Truth
I believe that people who are "churched" cannot change. They see nothing wrong with their lifestyle or their audacious behavior, looking down on those who may not be as SANCTIFIED as themselves. I should not, but I do secretly loathe them.
A Truth
I sin EVERYDAY.
A Truth
I'm fascinated with people's fascination about my sexuality, because I wonder what they're trying to prove, or hide.
A Truth
I've gained a lot of weight in the past year, and I'm uncomfortable with the way my body looks.
A Truth
When I flex my stomach muscles, I tell myself, "There's the hidden hope. There's still hope."
A Truth
Sometimes I scrunch my nostrils together in the mirror to envision what I'd look like with a nosejob...Much more European I believe...I'll pass...Thanks!
A Truth
I see myself on MTV
A Truth
I see myself working at McDonald's
A Truth
I wear my REGRETS like ashy skin...I don't like it to show...so I hide it, but it always comes back after a good shower.
A Truth
Disappointing my mother is by far the thing that scares me the most...Hell is a close 2nd.
A Truth
At some point I've probably disliked every friend I've ever had...and some I still kinda don't care for, and they always know why.
A Truth
I have friends who, periodically, think they're better than me, but they're too ashamed to admit it, but I can smell it on them. (Because I'm better than them) LOL A joke...a TRUE JOKE...the second part anyway.
In all this...I hope you read. I hope you understand. I hope you do.
JG
A Truth
I get annoyed by loud noises, especially in the midst of silence, while I'm eating my applesauce in the living room and someone takes it upon themselves, or rather, believes that I MUST need a piano/keyboard/steeldrum/guitar serenade. No thanks.
A Truth
People, especially women, who refuse to see the point at hand and care solely about their hurt feelings, neglecting the fact that in a relationship (especially with an artist), you need to look beyond yourself and no that I GOT NEEDS TOO. (Two selfish people cannot co-exist...without a little pushing and shoving...) NOT AN ADVOCATE FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE...
A Truth
I think I'm a genius. But my very lethargic TUMOR of a sub-personality weighs me down.
A Truth
Sometimes I fear disappointment so much, that I'd rather text than talk on the phone.
A Truth
I hold my nose whenever I'm asked to put toilet paper in the womens' restroom at work...I have a fear of what it might smell like.
A Truth
If I can see Godly qualities in you, and you smile a lot, I probably think you're a beautiful creation.
A Truth
I believe that evil resides in certain forms of music. I also believe that a chosen few have adopted that evil and it's aroma has attracted and successfully hooked a brainwashed youth into forming a cult-like following.
A Truth
I believe that people who are "churched" cannot change. They see nothing wrong with their lifestyle or their audacious behavior, looking down on those who may not be as SANCTIFIED as themselves. I should not, but I do secretly loathe them.
A Truth
I sin EVERYDAY.
A Truth
I'm fascinated with people's fascination about my sexuality, because I wonder what they're trying to prove, or hide.
A Truth
I've gained a lot of weight in the past year, and I'm uncomfortable with the way my body looks.
A Truth
When I flex my stomach muscles, I tell myself, "There's the hidden hope. There's still hope."
A Truth
Sometimes I scrunch my nostrils together in the mirror to envision what I'd look like with a nosejob...Much more European I believe...I'll pass...Thanks!
A Truth
I see myself on MTV
A Truth
I see myself working at McDonald's
A Truth
I wear my REGRETS like ashy skin...I don't like it to show...so I hide it, but it always comes back after a good shower.
A Truth
Disappointing my mother is by far the thing that scares me the most...Hell is a close 2nd.
A Truth
At some point I've probably disliked every friend I've ever had...and some I still kinda don't care for, and they always know why.
A Truth
I have friends who, periodically, think they're better than me, but they're too ashamed to admit it, but I can smell it on them. (Because I'm better than them) LOL A joke...a TRUE JOKE...the second part anyway.
In all this...I hope you read. I hope you understand. I hope you do.
JG
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